Grandstand needs a dress code
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Picture this: You’re at a middle school girls’ basketball game at an area gym. The bleachers are full of parents, grandparents and students waiting for the game to begin.
There is commotion in the top corner of the bleachers and you turn around to notice a group of young men holding handmade signs designed to cheer on the athletes. Some of the boys are shirtless, with numbers painted on their chests.
A few minutes later, a trio of girls slinks past you with devilish grins on their faces. “We did it,” one says to a friend. “I can’t show you yet.”
A few minutes later, the three eighth-grade girls roll up their T-shirts to reveal they had painted their abdomens in a show of team spirit.
The girls proceed to stand in the bleachers and parade around the gym with their shirts rolled up so far you could see the bottom of their bras.
I was horrified.
I don’t consider myself a prude, but I find it distasteful to see a shirtless young man parading around a sporting event in which he is not participating, yet that seems to be accepted in high school gyms and stadiums around here.
But when these middle school girls bared their midriffs in a school gym, as a mother of a daughter that age, I was appalled.
What on earth were they thinking and where were their mothers?
I’ll give the girls the benefit of the doubt and assume they thought they were showing school spirit. I’ll suppose they don’t know the dangers that could result from flaunting their bodies. I’ll hope their parents would be horrified if they saw their young ladies.
The three reveled in the attention they got from the shirtless boys, as well as from the gaggle of appropriately dressed peers who gathered around them.
I probably watched the half-dressed students as much as I watched the game that night and I don’t even want to think about which group of teens saw more action.
I scanned the gym expecting to see at least one of the handful of teachers and school officials there dart over to tell the girls to put their shirts down and the boys to put shirts on, but it never happened.
Though I was shocked and disappointed by the actions of the teens, I was even more disappointed that no school official reprimanded them.
This is a school where the dress code prohibits shoes without heel straps, for Pete’s sake.
According to the student handbook, “A student’s dress, personal appearance, hygiene, and behavior should reflect a sensitivity to and a respect for others.”
Trust me, there was no sensitivity and respect for others in the (lack of) attire.
The handbook also prohibits running shorts, swimming shorts, boxer shorts, pajamas, tank tops, halter tops, tube tops and midriff tops, as well as other restrictions.
I sat there, utterly confounded. You can’t wear a coat or hat into the classroom, according to the handbook, but you can apparently run around scantily clad in the gymnasium. What’s wrong with this picture?
I decided to call the school office and talk to the official who doles out discipline.
I asked him about the dress code and if it extends to extracurricular activities.
He explained that, technically, the dress code applies only during school hours, but it does extend to school activities and events happening after hours on school property.
He said students are to be dressed appropriately for after-school activities and a relaxed attire isn’t a problem “unless it becomes a distraction.”
Personally, I think the seeing bras sticking out under rolled up T-shirts was definitely a “distraction.”
When I described the girls’ outfits to the official, he didn’t express the horror that I felt (I’m sure he’s dealt with much more offensive violations), but he did say, “We would suggest they don’t do that.”
I asked if teachers are responsible for policing the dress code. He said in most cases, teachers will report an offense to him and he discusses the matter with the students. In this case, however, no teacher reported a code violation.
He also said the dress and behavior of students at after-school activities should be enforced by parents. “We expect parents to police their own kids,” he explained.
As it happens, the parents of the girls weren’t at the game. I don’t know about the parents of the boys.
The officials said there are penalties for violating the dress code, but the first step typically for a first violation is to require the student to change. Subsequent offenses can include detention.
In the grand scheme of things, what the teens chose to do wasn’t criminal, nor do I think it rises to the occasion of detention. They weren’t hurting anyone, but they I think they did a disservice to themselves.
I wonder what the parents, grandparents and visiting athletes thought about the display.
It’s a shame a teacher didn’t pull the teens aside and at the very least explain that bare midriffs were in violation of the dress code, if not offensive.
And to the girls — we both know who you are — painting and baring your stomachs and exposing your undergarments is not team spirit, it’s tawdry. (If you don’t know the meaning of that word, please look it up.) There are better ways to support your school and attract (positive) attention without stripping.
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Andrea Ciccocioppo welcomes ideas and feedback from readers. She may be reached at 240-7125 ext. 235 or aciccocioppo@cumberlink.com
